This goes out to my wife, who I adore, on our thirty eighth wedding anniversary.
I have been in my new home for a few months. I have been settling in and enjoying my new residence and location. Yesterday I came to a somewhat sad realization but at the same time it affirmed to me what really makes me happy and what is most important in my life.
If you’ve read my previous post (Star Trek In A Band) you know that I have an affection for the original Star Trek TV show. And you would know that what I liked most about the show was the comradery of the crew, the all for one and one for all attitude, the common goal of the core characters, the brothers and sisters in arms.
When I was young, and still to this day, the brothers in arms attitude in a band was one of the things that attracted me to music. I thought I had found it in one band when I was much younger, and have been looking for it ever since.
But sadly yesterday I realized I will probably never find it, especially as I get older.
It’s not that fellow musicians aren’t or can’t be great people to work with. It’s at this age, myself included, we all bring years of experience and with that experience a lot of excess baggage, too much baggage to lose that sense of self and commit to a band.
We all have a lifetime of experiences and emotions that we cling to, that we will not and really should not give up because it’s what made us who we are, both good and bad.
So was I sad because I realized I won’t ever find an Enterprise crew?
As I lay in bed that night mulling over my latest life lesson, I also learned that what made me sad was not the lesson but realizing that I had lost another piece of my youth and there are not many left at my age.
But there was still one more epiphany for the day.
I may never find another Enterprise crew and that’s OK. What is truly important, what matters most, is I found and have had for the last thirty seven years my Juliet, my Guinevere, my only true love.
And what I know is that, her and I, us, that is what truly matters in this life.
I realized that whether I am in band, a group, writing and recording by myself, or just doing nothing, it doesn’t really matter.
It is all about her and I and being together.
That is one piece of my youth that has lasted throughout my life, love.
© Otis P Smith and About the Groove, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Otis P Smith and About the Groove with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.